


Abstract Lover

by Where_the_Stars_End



Category: Harry Potter - Fandom
Genre: F/M, Friendship, Funny, Modern, Psychic, Silly, no magic, texting au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-26
Updated: 2020-07-26
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:48:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25518328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Where_the_Stars_End/pseuds/Where_the_Stars_End
Summary: Lily pays a psychic to draw her soulmate. Only she’s not prepared for the drawing to come out looking like James Potter. A modern texting AU
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter
Comments: 8
Kudos: 49





	Abstract Lover

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys! Please enjoy this very real thing I did. I thought it was a good laugh. Be safe, wear a mask ams stream Folklore by Taylor Swift

Lily to GIRL SQUAD 3:13pm  
Lmao  
I did something dumb  
I’ve been getting ads all over Facebook about this psychic who will draw your soulmate… 

Marlene to GIRL SQUAD 3:27pm  
Tell me you didn’t…  
Lily  
Lily?!?!  
LILY 

Alice to GIRL SQUAD 3:28pm  
YOU PAID A PSYCHIC TO DO WHAT?!?! 

Mary to GIRL SQUAD 3:36pm  
Does she just do men or like…  
Lily send me the link 

Marlene to GIRL SQUAD 3:40pm  
MARY NO 

Lily to GIRL SQUAD 3:42pm  
Some of y’all about to be real mad at me  
It will be here in 24 hours  
And she ask you who prefer 

Alice to GIRL SQUAD 3:43pm  
I’d be to scared to do it  
What if she drew someone who’s not Frank? 

Mary to GIRL SQUAD 3:44pm  
There is NO way it wouldn’t be Frank 

Marlene to GIRL SQUAD 3:44pm  
Just like there is NO way it wouldn’t be James for Lily 

Lily to GIRL SQUAD 3:45pm  
IT WON'T BE JAMES 

Alice to GIRL SQUAD 3:45pm  
OH YOU ARE SO RIGHT 

Mary to GIRL SQUAD 3:45pm  
It’s 100% gonna be James 

Lily to GIRL SQUAD 3:46pm  
NO 

Marlene to GIRL SQUAD 3:46pm  
YES 

Lily to GIRL SQUAD 3:48pm  
It’s not gonna be James  
It’s probably just gonna be some generic white guy  
With a name like Tom or Brad 

Marlene to GIRL SQUAD 3:49pm  
There is NO way the star, the ICON that is Lily Evans is going to be with some generic man  
You are going to have a man worthy of Lover  
The Nick to your Jess  
The Ben to your Leslie  
The Gilbert to your Anne  
The Frank to your Alice for God Sake 

Lily to GIRL SQUAD 3:54pm  
AWWWWWWWW  
MAR  
That’s so sweet 

Mary to GIRL SQUAD 3:55pm  
That’s right Lily!  
Which is why  
It’s gonna be James 

Alice to GIRL SQUAD 3:57pm  
You think Frank and I are on the same level as Gilbert and Anne?!?!? 

Mary to GIRL SQUAD 3:57pm  
Yes 

Marlene to GIRL SQUAD 3:57pm  
Absolutely 

Lily to GIRL SQUAD 3:57pm  
Without a doubt Alice 

Alice to GIRL SQUAD 3:59pm  
AWWWWWW  
BRB I gotta go text Frank about this 

Mary to GIRL SQUAD 4:02pm  
Lily  
Lily love  
Drop the link to this because I am curious 

Lily to GIRL SQUAD 4:03pm  
Just texted it to you  
But it was on sale!  
So it’s either gonna be REALLY funny or true  
And that’s worth 30 bucks to me 

Alice to GIRL SQUAD 4:06pm  
Frank said he appreciates being compared to Gilbert but we should know better  
Because we have our own Anne and Gilbert  
In the form of Lily and James  
Literally  
L.M Montgomery traveled into the future  
Learned about Lily and James  
Traveled BACK in time and changed the names  
And wrote Anne of Green Gables 

Lily to GIRL SQUAD 4:12pm  
Alice…  
Do you know how stupid that sounds?  
What would she use? 

Marlene to GIRL SQUAD 4:13pm  
I don’t know Lily  
Something stupid  
Like something called a Time Turner 

Lily to GIRL SQUAD 4:14pm  
And she ONLY used it to write a book?  
Not to stop wars?  
Or the Titanic from sinking?  
Why ONLY for the one small thing? 

Alice to GIRL SQUAD 4:17pm  
Because it’s my story  
And I get to use any plot hole I want  
It’s not like it’s a major selling book series or something  
But you do have to admit  
It fits 

Mary to GIRL SQUAD 4:17pm  
It really does fit 

Marlene to GIRL SQUAD 4:18pm  
You slamming a white board down on James’ head is straight up FACTS 

Lily to GIRL SQUAD 4:19pm  
Those facts are irrelevant  
And they will NOT stand up in court  
James and I are just friends 

Marlene to GIRL SQUAD 4:21pm  
You are gonna waste 30 dollars  
This psychic (and I don’t even believe in them) is just  
Gonna show you a picture of James 

Lily to GIRL SQUAD 4:24pm  
Fine  
When I get the package I’m not sharing it with ANY of you 

Alice to GIRL SQUAD 4:24pm  
Oh come on Lily! 

Mary to GIRL SQUAD 4:24pm  
Don’t be like that 

Marlene to GIRL SQUAD 4:25pm  
Don’t be upset because we speak the truth 

Lily to GIRL SQUAD 4:27pm  
Why don’t you use the stupid time turner and go back and not make fun of me? 

Marlene changed group name to JILY IS SHIRBERT 

Marlene to JILY IS SHIRBERT 4:29pm  
Suck on that Lily 

Alice to JILY IS SHIRBERT 4:32pm  
Please don’t hold Marlene’s actions against Mary and I Lily  
I desperately want to know 

Mary to JILY IS SHIRBERT 4:33pm  
Really though  
I want to know who’s gonna be right 

Marlene to JILY IS SHIRBERT 4:36pm  
Babies 

Lily to JILY IS SHIRBERT 4:37pm  
Fine  
Because I am a kind and merciful friend  
I will still share  
But no more nonsense!  
I mean it  
Promise me 

Alice to JILY IS SHIRBERT 4:37pm  
I Promise!!!!!!! 

Mary to JILY IS SHIRBERT 4:37pm  
Me too! 

Lily to JILY IS SHIRBERT 4:44pm  
Marlene?  
Do you promise? 

Marlene to JILY IS SHIRBERT 4:47pm  
Fine  
I promise 

Lily to JILY IS SHIRBERT 4:48pm  
Good  
I’ll keep you ladies updated 

Alice to JILY IS SHIRBERT 9:02pm  
God this is taking FOREVER 

Mary to JILY IS SHIRBERT 9:07pm  
Well  
This means it’s a good sign!  
She’s not just copy and pasting the same shit over and over 

Marlene to JILY IS SHIRBERT 9:10pm  
We just have to be patient to see that it is in fact James 

Lily to JILY IS SHIRBERT 9:13pm  
MARLENE  
YOU PROMISED 

Marlene to JILY IS SHIRBERT 9:17pm  
Ugh  
Fine 

Marlene changed group name to Lily is a LIAR 

Lily to Lily is a LIAR 9:23pm  
WOW  
rude 

Mary to Lily is a LIAR 9:27pm  
Marlene be nice!  
I want to be told about things! 

Alice changed group name to its SO not James 

Lily to its SO not James 9:34pm  
You’re on THIN ice Alice

Lily to its SO not James 8:32am  
ITS HERE  
ITS HERE 

Alice to its SO not James 8:37am  
AHHHHHHHHHH 

Mary to its SO not James 8:39am  
TELL US 

Marlene to its SO not James 8:42am  
So?  
Tell us about him! 

Lily is its SO not James 8:45am  
No  
Marlene was right  
This was stupid  
It’s a waste of money 

Mary to its SO not James 8:46am  
Oh my god  
It’s James isn’t it 

Lily to its SO not James 8:47am  
No…

Alice to its SO not James 8:47am  
Okay,  
Does it look like Gilbert? 

Lily to its SO not James 8:48am  
….  
Maybe  
I am just gonna send all his info  
Beware it’s LONG

Your Reading:

Your reading came to me strongly, I was able to access that you could potentially know this person or be meeting this person within the next 9 months providing you are open to the idea and allow positive energy into your life. This isn't a guarantee, it is merely the time frame in which I can see this person entering your life in some way. Trying to predict an exact timeline of when you will meet is extremely difficult and consuming for the soul, my experience has allowed me to give you a close to accurate time frame. 

Friendliness: Welcoming, this person is extremely open to meeting new people and they certainly make people around them feel warm and comfortable.  
Honesty: Honorable, lying is one of this person’s biggest hates, they pride themselves in being honest and trustworthy.  
Assertiveness: A leader (when necessary), this person seems to be a challenging force in business and that carries across into their personal life  
Confidence / Ego: Insecure, in some ways the person feels as though they need to prove their worth to loved ones.  
Agreeableness: A peacemaker, hates confrontation unless they are defending their beliefs.  
Manners: Polite, extremely well-mannered and respectful in both open and close situations.  
Discipline: Methodical, this person is a true thinker, they think hard about every action before it is made, this is a very highly sort after trait.  
Rebelliousness: Hates structure and routine, doesn’t comply with being told what to do.  
Emotional capacity: Loving, this person has a huge heart that they are just waiting to share with everyone close to them.  
Intelligence: Logical, extremely focused on what’s important in life, very eager to learn and grow as a person.  
Positivity: Complacent, this person is happy with where they are in life but is still missing that one special person.  
Activeness / Lifestyle: Roving, loves to travel and see the world, they want to experience as much as they can in this life.  
Current emotional state: Sympathetic, understands the hardships of everyday life and is always there to comfort those around them.

In order for you to increase the odds of meeting this person, I recommend living life to the full and accepting any opportunity that comes your way, try not to get yourself down on the small things in life and focus on what’s important to you, be true to yourself and you will find love. Finding your soulmate is all about allowing your energy and spiritual aura to be one with the earth and your surroundings, if you are not attuned or aligned with your core you will struggle to find your soulmate in life and they will struggle to find you.

This has been a fantastic reading and again I really appreciate the opportunity! 

Mary changed group name to its James 

Alice to its James 9:00am  
Lily  
Lily sweetie  
That’s James  
Like  
Without a doubt 

Marlene to its James 9:02am  
I’m screaming  
Psychics are real  
I’ve changed my mind  
Because THATS James  
Send the picture  
Don’t be a coward 

Mary to its James 9:04am  
Lily sweetie  
I love you  
So I mean this in the KINDEST way  
When are you marrying James? 

Lily to its James 9:06am  
It is not James!  
He doesn’t think everything through! 

Mary to its James 9:06am  
LILY THATS ONE THING  
EVERYTHING ELSE IS SPOT ON 

Lily to its James 9:06am  
It is not! 

Marlene to its James 9:07am  
Fine  
Send us the picture then  
Prove it’s not James 

Lily to its James 9:08am  
You guys are just gonna see what you want to see 

Alice to its James 9:11am  
OH MY GOD  
LILY  
SEND THE FUCKING PICTURE 

Mary to its James 9:12am  
Look what you’ve done!  
You made Alice swear  
So you better send that picture 

Lily to its James 9:15am  
One attached image 

Marlene to its James 9:17am  
Okay  
So 

Alice to its James 9:19am  
Omg 

Mary to its James 9:20am  
Lily  
Love  
That’s James 

Lily to its James 9:23am  
FINE  
FINE  
ITS JAMES OK  
IT LOOKS LIKE JAMES  
HAPPY NOW 

Mary to its James 9:23am  
Lily  
Love it’s okay 

Alice to its James 9:24am  
I mean  
Don’t you like James? 

Lily to its James 9:26am  
Yes  
Okay  
I’ve liked him for like two years 

Marlene to its James 9:27am  
Okay that’s a good start!  
Are you gonna tell him?

Lily to its James 9:29am  
No!  
What if he doesn’t like me back? 

Alice to its James 9:32am  
Lily 

Mary to its James 9:33am  
James has been in love with you since you came out of the womb 

Marlene to its James 9:35am  
I have it on good authority he likes you

Lily to its James 9:36am  
I just don’t know 

Mary to its James 9:38am  
Fine  
Ask him yourself 

Mary added James to its James 

Lily to its James 9:39am  
MARLENE 

Mary to its James 9:30am  
James! 

James to its James 9:35am  
Hello? 

Alice to its James 9:35am  
Oh my god 

Marlene to its James 9:36am  
Shut up Alice 

Mary to its James 9:37am  
Do you like Lily?

James to its James 9:39am  
Woah  
Uh  
That’s a pretty strong question for 9am

Mary to its James 9:40am  
It’s almost 10  
Don’t be a baby  
But long story short  
Lily paid a psychic to draw her soulmate and describe him and its you. Literally to a T  
Scroll back in the chat and read for yourself 

James to its James 9:52am  
Uh  
I don’t think it’s me  
I definitely don’t think everything through 

Lily to its James 9:52am  
SEE  
WHAT DID I SAY 

Marlene to its James 9:53am  
OH MY GOD 

Mary to its James 9:54am  
Did you miss the part where Lily admitted she’s liked you for TWO YEARS 

James to its James 9:55am  
Oh yeah  
That 

Alice to its James 9:55am  
YEAH  
THAT 

James to its James 9:57am  
Well  
I thought Lily should be the one to tell me 

Marlene to its James 10:00am  
Lily  
Do you have something to say 

Lily to its James 10:01am  
Fuck off  
And  
Ummmm  
James  
I like you 

James to its James 10:02am  
Well  
Apparently it took a psychic to tell you but  
I’ve like you too Lily 

Alice to its James 10:02am  
AWWWWWWWWWW 

Mary to its James 10:03am  
ALICE SHUSH

James to its James 10:04am  
Oh boy  
This is so weird  
But ummmm Lily  
Would you like to go to dinner?  
With me?  
Tonight? 

Marlene to its James 10:05am  
SAY YES LILY 

Mary to its James 10:06am  
She says yes!!!! 

Lily to its James 10:06am  
I can speak for myself thank you  
Yes James  
I’d love to go to dinner 

Marlene to its James 10:07am  
Damn Lily  
You owe that Facebook psychic WAY more then 30 bucks


End file.
